I strongly believe that the answer to my destiny lies in my own self-discovery and in creating the results that I desire. And it is through my own personal self-discovery, education, and work experience that I will achieve my destined goals.
I began volunteering at the Documentation Center of Cambodia (DC-Cam) in 2002 and was promoted to a part-time staff memeber until 2007. On October 2003, I was attending a farewell party at "Millionaire" restaurant organized by DC-Cam to congratulate one of the DC-Cam staff members who had just received a scholarship to study tourism in the Netherlands.
It was the first time I met Ginger, a young woman who was modeling at "Millionaire". She looked beautiful, but a little scary. Later, she asked me to go with her to Spark, the biggest nightclub in Phnom Penh. I declined. I was just a student then.
I didn't realize that day how this fateful first meeting with Ginger would eventually change my life.
As part of the Victim of Torture Project at DC-Cam, which focuses on identifying traumatized victims from the Khmer Rouge regime, I decided to write a book about Ginger, entitled, Broken Glass of A Young Girl Named Ginger. The book is about Ginger's world as a bar girl who survived three abortions at a very young age and about her mother's world as a survivor of the Khmer Rouge regime. I put my steps into a different world and tried to understand what it feels like to be a teenager in Phnom Penh.
When I first started writing the book, I never imagined that it would challenge my way of thinking. But it did. I had to open up my mind and not to be judgemental. I had to think about what people like Ginger thought about me. Sometimes I did judge her. It was hard not to. And this bothered me.
But I came to understand that Ginger is no better or worse than anyone else. Laws exist to control behavior, but laws can't control what young people think. When the "Millionaire" restaurant became bankcrupt, being jobless was the best thing that could have happened for Ginger. She was getting older, so it was natural for her to start re-evaluating her life.
Only Ginger can tell her own story. I listened, but it was hard for me to hear what she had to struggle through. At first I was a little afraid of her, and what people think of me for associating with her. I worried her influence would weaken me. But by befriending Ginger, I was able to break through strongn class and social barriers so intrinsic in Cambodia society. In getting to know Ginger, I've learned she is a worthwhile person in her own way. Meeting Ginger had made me not weaker, but stronger.
The development of a broken country begins with unity, connection, and understanding between people. Deep social barriers should be gradually eliminated through the refinement of human relationships and through the identification of the root causes of social problems so that social conflicts can be resolved more efficiently and effectively.
Ginger's life not only broadened my understanding of Cambodia and the world; it also gave me insight into my own life, helping me to explore my own dreams and who I want to be. Although we live in different worlds, in many ways we are alike. We are young with high hopes for the future. Ginger told me, "I'm glad I woke up. I want to change my destiny." I am also hopeful that through my continuous self-discovery, education, experiences, and a strong passion to engage in meaningful work to help my community, I will also achieve my destiny. My understanding of Ginger and of myself is the key to my sucess.
